September 3, 2009

God And The World We Live In

I have been struggling lately and finding it very difficult to write. In my last blog I commented on how I don't like watching the news but I feel it is a necessary evil I want to be informed about what is happening in the world and my own community but I am so very tired of hearing about crimes against children about children being found in dumpsters, attempted abduction etc...
For someone like me these stories never leave my mind and it sends me on a hyper anxiety spiral. In the news now we are hearing of Jaycee Dugard found 18 years after her abduction living with her abductors and baring him 2 children!! Amazing, then reports come in of a 61 year old man physically assaulting a 2 year old child that was crying in a Wal~Mart store right in front of her mother. Reports state the child was crying and this old bastard walks up to the mother and says"Shut that kid up or I will shut her up for you!!" When the child didn't stop crying he returned to the mother and crying child and proceeded to smack the child across the face 3 to 5 times!! A total stranger to this woman can you even imagine?

Then to add insult to injury people were calling in to the news show saying well it's wrong what happened BUT parents need to control their kids!! Really?!? Like we as parents like to go run our errands with a crying child!! This is the mentality out their? This is the world we live in? This man was wrong but not as wrong as the child and mother and he shouldn't be punished was the popular opinion of the viewers who called in. Disgust pure disgust for these types of people I mean I am lost pro life says a child is a human when their is a heartbeat but a child doesn't have civil rights until they turn 18 years of age? I don't get it I just don't get it! You see what I have been struggling with most is my faith and how it can coincide with the world today and current events in particular the passage from the bible that I am struggling with is the book of Job.

I have been struggling with the book of Job because in the book of Job the angel Lucifer who is not seen as Gods adversary but his most trusted agent asks God if he could test Job to see just how faithful Job truly is to God. God says he can test Job but Lucifer cannot touch Job but his children, livestock and everything else he posses is fair game. The angel Lucifer sets into motion for ALL of Jobs children to be killed his wife and all his livestock but Job stays faithful to God and Lucifer asks God if he can test him again because Lucifer feels he is close to breaking Job and this time God allows Lucifer to harm Job and in the end Job asks God why he has done these thing to him? Why he has punished him? Job repents and becomes humble before God and God rewards Job with a new family and more livestock. Now what I struggle with is that Lucifer can do nothing without Gods permission first so then when you hear news reports of children being abducted, molested, and murdered did God okay it first?

Did God allow Samantha Runion to be kidnapped and murdered? Danielle Van Damn to be kidnapped from her bedroom by her neighbor while her family slept? Mathew Checkey to have his throat slashed by a drugged up junkie in a beach restroom while his aunt waited for him outside? Jessica Lungsford to be abducted and buried alive in her neighbors yard? Like most I want answers to why these thing happen or even someone to blame. To find reason in the chaos of the world we live in today. I know these people are responsible for their own actions and they themselves are to blame for the lives they take and the families they destroy.

I wish I could be like most who hear the news and just shake my head no and never think of it again. I wish I didn't memorize the names of murdered and abducted children. I wish I didn't have anxiety but I do and these stories have brought out of me a new obsession with brushing my teeth. I can't seem to get them as clean as I would like them to be. I am obsessed with using whitening toothpaste, flossing and just brushing them over and over and over again. My dentist will be pleased I'm sure *wink*wink. Anyway thank you for listening to me whine and for all the supportive comments and suggestions.



  1. The man's name is Roger Stephens he is 61 years of age and he lives in Georgia.

  2. I didn't hear about that story - of the older fellow assaulting that child in the store! I am in shock! I wonder if he has early stages of alzheimers because that can make elder people violent. That is no excuse though!! and I am astounded that people would speak up in any type of public forum and support his actions!!! I am almost speechless and physically sickened. This makes me feel very anxious to feel we may or may not be safe from people like this, when out with my son in public. (We already get so many people who come up and talk to, try to touch him, interrupt our dinner at a restaurant simply because my son is Korean (we adopted this year)...people act as if they've never seen an Asian child before. It really bugs me sometimes)

    I feel we think alike in many ways. Your post is very thought provoking. I struggle with some of the same types of thoughts, wondering how could the Lord allow some of these things to happen? But then I rationalize and think He doesn't Cause these incidents, or necessarily allow them - but has given us the ultimate gift of life, freedom, conscious decision, and free will and the ultimate responsibility to delight in His will and live a morally correct life...But He doesn't intervene when we sin and do wrong..and that we will have to stand in judgement in the end...and will reap what we sow. That's how I try to make sense of it all...but all the hate, evil, sadness and tradgedy still hurts and still leaves me in disbelief and shock...and with anxieties about being out in this world among these people (monsters)....

    I have to say again...I admire you for sharing your inner thoughts and anxieties. I think you are stronger than you realize. *hugs*


  3. i didnt hear about that story