April 3, 2010

THE A$$H@LE'$ BIBLE


If you know a guy who is an a$$h@le it is very likely he has read this book and it has become his bible and Tucker Max his Jesus!!! Now it takes a special kind of stupid a$$h@le to read this book and believe all the events written about actually happened or have not been grossly and incredibly over exaggerated. It is a juvenile literary work that has convinced intellectually challenged guys that these rewritten Penthouse forum stories actually happened not only to the hero Tucker Max but his friends.

Now I have read the book and it is humorous and disgusting, it is offensive to various groups and makes no apologies for it. It is found under the HUMOROUS section of Barnes and Noble not the BIOGRAPHY section, a minor detail overlooked by some readers. Again he has to be a special kind of stupid to totally believe these stories are real and to put these tactics into practice in his life for the purpose of picking up women and or helping his friend/friends get laid.

I had the pleasure of running into such a delusional a$$h@le last night who bated me into a conversation and when I misspoke, something that my intellectual superior has never done before in his own life, he pounced on me and immediately started insulting my intelligence. He took up the character of "Sling Blade" although he really wanted to be the main character Tucker Max (Tucker is the one who gets ALL the a$$) he went what they affectionately call "Mad Max" on me. A move to appear as the biggest a$$h@le I have ever encountered so that his friend would appear as the nice guy and the one to go home with.

YES LADIES THEY REALLY THINK WE ARE THAT SIMPLE AND EASY!!!!

Now this exchange was humorous to me because I have read the book so I understood the game, however my opponent didn't expect that and was irritated that I would no longer engage him and was insulted that I was bored by his performance, something I think he hears from women more often then not. Which makes sense as to why in his group of friends he is their "Sling Blade". Remember ladies I am not in my 20's I am in my mid 30's and so was this winner!!!

To my opponent "Sling Blade" thanks for the laugh and remember you are special, you are important, and gosh darn it people like you. However I am not one of them I think you are a total douche bag!!! Oh hey did I mention I was a writer???

1 comment:

  1. I know that you are one tough cookie but wish I was with you so I could have smashed him! "It stops talking to its intellectual superior..." Will always be your over protective Bear.

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