January 2, 2010
How Do You Know You Are Unhappily Married?
How do you know when your unhappy in your marriage? How do you know when you are at your limit if your spouse has no idea why you are leaving? Last year a lot of couples informed us they were getting divorced or separating. All seemed totally out of left field and I know that we really have no idea what another persons relationship/marriage is really like behind closed doors but what made them even more shocking was the spouses lack of knowledge of their partners unhappiness. How do you help a heartbroken friend or relative if they have no idea where things went wrong in their marriage?
So it got me thinking how do you know you are unhappy in your marriage? I mean all marriages go through their ups and downs and some months your spouse just bugs the heck out of you!! But how long of a grace period do you give yourself? Years, months, weeks? Now I am not talking about the obvious unhappiness in a marriage like your spouse has had affairs on you or is abusive in some way I am talking about the everyday issues. Like they never help me with the kids or I am so unappreciated kind of stuff, the stuff that every couple has to deal with because no relationship is truly 50/50.
There is always someone who does more in the relationship so what makes the other person really leave? Do they see someone elses relationship and say to themselves I want to be treated that way? I have been exposed to divorce in my life through family and friends and in having a front row seat I have experienced divorce from different perspective and seemingly in each case the "NEW" person that the divorcee ends up with does maybe 1 or 2 things different than the first spouse did. For example the "NEW" spouse likes to go dancing enjoys country music and opens the car door for me or she likes to go camping and ride motorcycles but everything else is the same as the first wife/husband.
So how do you know you need to get a new spouse? How do you know you need a change in spouse not a change in you? After all no one is perfect.
~*Note To Readers*~
This blog post has NOTHING to do with my personal life. It is only an observation of what has been happening around me.